Yeka indlela enhle ngayo ixesha lothando, kunye nobusuku bokulala, izimbali zeentyatyambo, izifungo zokunyaniseka kunye nenjabulo yokonwaba! Kodwa kukho imini, inyanga kwaye ngokukhawuleza uqala ukuqaphela ukuba umthandayo wakho utshintshile ngokukhawuleza. Nasiphi na isenzo saqala ukuphazamiseka, kwaye iintlobo ezilula zomzi zaqala ukukhula zibe zihlazo. Musa ukumangaliswa - uqale nje ixesha lokungaqondi, kwaye, ngokulula, ubunzima bezobudlelwane.
Ukungaboni kakuhle kwintsapho
Ininzi yezibini ezitshatileyo zingena kwindlela epholileyo yobomi esitshatileyo iqinisekile ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba abayi kuchatshazelwa yizo zonke iingxaki kunye neengxabano zobomi esi sizukulwana esidala esoyisa rhoqo. Akunandaba nokuba kunjalo! Ukungavisisani phakathi kwabatshatileyo kwenzeka ngonyaka wokuqala emva komtshato. Akukho sizathu sokuba iingqondo zengqondo zibiza ngengozi yonyaka wokuqala. Makhe sibone oko sikwenzayo kakubi ngolwalamano lwethu kwaye kutheni ama-90% abatsha abasha abanobunzima bokungaqondi kwimindeni.
Ukuqala, apho, apho iindibano zentlalo kuphela ziqala ukuvela, njengokuba indoda nomfazi bazalwa ngokukhawuleza kwaye baqondanga. Kutheni oku kwenzekayo? Iimpendulo zemibuzo ebonakala ngathi nzima kunamaxesha onke. Masibekwe kwii-shelves, apho kungabikho ukungaqondi kakuhle. Phendule ngokwakho kumbuzo: xa utshata okanye uvuma ukuhlala kunye kunye (njengesiqingatha sesibini), ucinga ukuba intsapho yakho iya kuba njani? Ucinga malunga nokuba kuya kuba njani, akunjalo? Ngoku uyeka uze ucinge. Kodwa lakho iqabane licinga ngandlela-thile ubomi obudibeneyo. Kwaye abazange bakho abazali abaye bamkhupha, kodwa abantu abangabaziyo kuwe. Yintoni esiyifumayo ngenxa yoko: indoda kunye nomfazi bahluke ngokwabo, kwaye baqala ukuhlala kunye, basebenzisa iipatheni ezibonakalayo kwinkqubo yokukhula ejikelezwe ngabazali babo. Ngamanye amazwi, isibini sinabantu ababini abaneengcamango ezibini ezahlukeneyo malunga nobomi bentsapho. Kwaye emva koko, uyazibuza ukuba kukuphi ukunyaniseka nokungaqondi kakuhle kwintsapho? Iipatheni zokujonga ubomi bentsapho, oku akusizo zonke izizathu zolu donga lokwahlukana nomntu esimthandayo esakhayo ngezandla zethu. I-Panacea, eya kuphula yonke imiqobo yokungaqondi, namhlanje ayikho. Nangona kunjalo, kukho iingcebiso eziqhelekileyo eziye zavela kwiimeko ezibuhlungu ezibini ezitshatileyo ezinamava amaninzi. Emva kokuphulaphula, uya kuba nako ukugcina umtshato kunye nobudlelwane bakho.
Njani ukunqoba ukungaqondi?
Ngoko, ulwalamano lwakho lwafika ekugqibeleni. Kubonakala kuwe ukuba uvela kwiiplanethi ezahlukeneyo, uthetha iilwimi ezahlukileyo, kwaye akuyi kuze kubekho ukuphela kwesi sidima. Ngelishwa, abantu bahlala bexuba uthando kunye nokungaqondi kakuhle. Ngenxa yokuzingca kwethu, sichaza uxanduva lobudlelwane nomntu othandekayo. Nangona eqinisweni, lowo unomdla kakhulu kuwo kufuneka awalwe.
Kwaye ekubeni ufunda le ngcaciso, masiqhubeke kunye kunye nendlela yokulwa nokungaqondi:
- Funda ukuthetha. Lo ngumgaqo olula weso sibini esitshatileyo ngenxa yezizathu ezithile ezingagcinwanga. Kwaye kaninzi iintombi. Awuyithandi isenzo: sigxinyiwe, sithule, sitshatile entloko, sikhunjulwe. Kwaye amaninzi amaninzi ngokulandelana. Kwaye kuhlamba sonke siye sabonisa ukuthembeka kwethu kudala. Kwaye enyanisweni akayikrokreli ukuba asinelisekanga ngento ethile. Kwaye ke sibe nomonde, simangalela umntu ngenxa yezono zonke kwaye simemeza ukuba abayiqondi. Emva kwakho konke, unokuthetha ngokukhawuleza yonke into, kodwa ungagcini ukungazinzi ngaphakathi kwakho, kunene?
- Khawucinge ngolu hlobo: ukhathele emva komsebenzi, usuke uhambela ekhaya, udibana nomntu ongenelisekanga ngeendlela zakho zokuhlala, ngaphandle kokukunika ikhefu, uqala ukubuza imibuzo malunga nendlela othanda ngayo, uyacaphuka ukuba uyamnika ixesha elincinci, kwaye akamkeli iimpendulo ezinjengezo zinto ukhathele kwaye ufanele ulale. Ngaba akubukeka ngathi nantoni na? Kodwa ininzi intombazana yenza okufanayo kunye nabathandekayo babo. Emva koko bayacaphuka ukuba "bangayiqondi."
- Akunakuze naphantsi kweemeko azixoxe ngezihlobo zakho zesiqingatha. Ewe, bonke baneempazamo. Kodwa yena wakhula kunye nabo, bangabantu abasondele kuye. Kwimeko apho, uya kukhetha, hhayi wena. Musa ukuzibangela isizathu esingavumelekanga sokungavumelani.
- Yingenakulungiswa. Kulula kakhulu: ukupheka isidlo sakuthandayo, ukudibana kunye nobuso bakho, ukuvumela ukuba uphinde ufumane emva komsebenzi wosuku olunzima. Yiba nomonde ukuphulaphula elinye ibali malunga nabaphangi abazondayo, osebenza naye ozama ukufaka indawo kunye nokuba yintoni umshini umhlobo athengiweyo.
Amadoda ayazi indlela yokubulela. Mnike okulungileyo, kwaye uya kuhlala ephindaphinda.
Imizekelo yendlela yokuphepha ukungaqondi kakuhle kulwalamano lunokubaluleka ngokungapheliyo. Khumbula omnye umthetho oyintloko - ikhaya alilona lize labanjwa ngabasetyhini. Yenza konke ukwenza umntu wakho abe nemfuneko kwaye uyathandwa. Ukwazi ukuthetha ngokuchanekileyo malunga noko ungathanda ukutshintsha ebomini bakho kunye. Ukuphula iingqinamba zokungaqondani, ungazivumeli ukuba zivele zivele. Inkqama yowesifazane akucingi nje ngaye, kodwa nangenxa yeminqweno yomntu. Yinyamekele uthando lwakho, wazi ukuba umbonelela njani, kwaye uya kukuphendula ngokukhanya kokufudumala kwabantu kunye nokubulela kukhethiweyo wakho.