Umxholo wokwanda komntu namhlanje kumlomo wonke. Wazinikela ezininzi iincwadi, zonke iintlobo zokuqeqesha, njl. Kukho abantu abayiqonda eli gama njengokufunda kumava nolwazi, ukuphakamisa izinga lobunkokheli, kodwa abantu abanjalo banokuba neengxaki zokunxibelelana nokuzithemba. Ngoko ke, ukukhula komntu kunye nokuzakhela ngokweenkcazo ziingcamango ezinzulu ezibandakanya zonke iinkalo zobomi bomntu.
Ungaqala njani ukuzithuthukisa?
Kufuneka kuthathelwe ukuba le nkqubo iqhubeka kwaye ngaphandle kokuthatha inxaxheba komntu, ngenxa yokuba ukhula, "izikhonkwane ezixhamlileyo," izigqibo zize ziguqule iimpawu zayo zangaphakathi. Kodwa ukukhula komntu ngokwasemsebenzini kunomsebenzi ohlukileyo, kuphakamisa ukuba umntu uyazibeka iinjongo ebomini aze aye kuye, wenza umgudu wokuwufezekisa kwaye atshintshe iinkolelo zakhe. Le ndlela ayinakwenzeka ngaphandle kokuziphucula, ukutshatyalaliswa kwimihla ngemihla kunye nokwesaba kwakho. Kwi-psychology yokuzihlakulela, ukukhula komntu kuthiwa yindlela yokufumana injabulo kunye nempumelelo .
Yintoni ofuna ukuyifumana? Nazi ezinye zamanyathelo:
- Ukuzithandana nothando olungenammiselo. Musa ukugxeka iimpazamo, musa ukuzidela. Endaweni yoko, zinike ithuba lokuba ixesha elizayo uzama ukwenza ngcono, utshintshe into, eya kukunceda ukhangele amehlo akho.
- Thatha uxanduva lwakho kubomi bakho. Abaninzi basolisa ukungaphumeleli kwabo nabani na, ngaphandle kokuqaphela ukuba eli liko lomntwana, kungekhona lomntu omdala. Kubalulekile ukuqala ukwenza into ngaphandle kokufakela abantu abasondeleyo. Ngokomzekelo, ukufumana olunye umsebenzi ngokuzimeleyo, uhambe naluphi na izifundo zoqeqesho okanye ukhuphukela phezulu kwe-Everest. Ewe, kuya kunkwantya, kodwa kusemva kwento entsha kwaye ingachangeki ukuba into evulekileyo iya kukhuthaza ukukhula komntu.
- Ukuzihlakulela komntu kunikezela ukuchaswa konke okungekho nto, okuthintela ukwenza ubomi bube bhetele. Kubani umntu umkhwa wokuziphatha, kodwa kumntu ujikelezo lwezonxibelelwano. Kubalulekile ukukholelwa kuwe nokuba ubomi bube buhle, kufuneka nje wenze isinyathelo sokuqala kuso.
- Ukuzikhusela ngokuzimela kwabasetyhini kukuyeka ukugxeka omnye umntu, kuquka nam. Akunabantu abafezekileyo, kwaye xa umnqweno wokulungisa umntu uvuswa, kufuneka nje ucele, kwaye oku kuya kwenza njani ubomi bakho buvuyiswe ngakumbi kwaye buvuyiswe?
Kukho imiba eninzi, kodwa into ephambili ayikukuhlehlisa ubomi bakho ngomso. Mfutshane kakhulu kwaye kubalulekile ukuhlala apha kwaye ngoku, kwaye ngoko ke kwakungekho buhlungu kakhulu ngenxa yokungafihlanga iminyaka.