Ingqungquthela - indlela yokululela umntwana ekuzidumiseni?

Ngaba uqaphele ukuba umntwana wakho uyathanda ukuzidumisa? Musa ukuxhalaba, oku akusilo siphene esona sikhulu esingavela kwinkqubo yokukhulisa umntwana, nangona kungakufanelekanga ukuphawula ngaphandle kokuqwalasela. Awuqondi ukuba wonke umntu, abadala kunye nabantwana, uyayidinga. Emva koko, akukho nto ihlazo kwiinjongo zabo bonke abantu ukuba bazibonakalise bevela kwicala elifanelekileyo. Enye into yinto xa umntwana efuna ukuzibonga aqala ukuphinda aphindaphindiwe kwaye kaninzi akakho konke okufanelekileyo. Kule meko, mhlawumbi, abazali benza iphutha ekukhuliseni umntwana, ngoko kukufanelekile ukunyamekela oku, ukufumanisa izizathu zeli narcisiss kunye nokuzama ukulungisa ukuziphatha komntwana.

I-Baby-braggart - ifuna izizathu

Uninzi lwabafundi beengqondo lubambe imbono yokuba ukuziqhayisa kukuhlobo lokuziqinisa, okuyiyona nkalo eqhelekileyo ekuphuhlisweni komntwana ngamnye. Imizamo yokuqala yokuzibonga ingabonwa kubantwana abaneminyaka engama-2 ubudala, kwaye ukuphakama kwento enjalo kubonakala kwiminyaka engama-6-7. Kwimeko apho ukuziphatha komntwana akuhambanga ngaphezu kwe-self-confirmation, kungcono ukuba ungayithobeli. Ixesha elithile liya kudlula kwaye inkunzi iya kufumana iindlela ezintsha zokuphumeza indumiso yabantu abadala kunye nokuqaphela abanye. Nangona kunjalo, ngamanye amaxesha umnqweno womntwana wokuziqhayisa nokutsala ingqwalasela ukuba ube ngumsebenzi onzima kwaye uqale ukucima ezinye iimpawu zobuntu.

Ngokuqhelekileyo, abazali ngokwabo yizona ziphumo zendlela yokuziphatha komntwana, kuba zonke izakhono neempawu, ezilungileyo kunye ezimbi, abantwana bathabatha kubazali babo. Ngako oko, kunokwenzeka ukuba isizathu esifanele sifumaneke kwiintsapho zobudlelwane. Iibraggi zivame ukukhula kulabo bazali abafuna ukubona umntwana wabo obalaseleyo naphakade. Ekuphenduleni, umntwana uzama ukulinganisa iimfuno zabazali kunye nenjongo yakhe ephambili kukufumana indumiso nokufezekisa ukuphakama kwabanye. Ukongezelela, ukwesaba ukugqithisa ngakumbi kunabo bonke kwaye ngaloo ndlela ukuphoxeka kubazali bakho kuba lukhulu. Ngoko ke, ngokuziqhayisa, umntwana uyazama ukuhlawulela ukuxhalaba kwakhe ngokweqile nokuzithemba.

Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba i-braggart encinci ingakhula kungekuphela kwintsapho apho ayithandayo. Abantwana abanqunywe ngqalelo kubazali, abasoloko bezisebenzisela ukuzibonga njengendlela yokutsala ingqalelo.

Ingqungquthela encinci: indlela yokululela ekuzidumiseni?

Okokuqala, yeka ukuvavanya nokuthelekisa umntwana wakho kunye nabanye abantwana. Gxininisa ingqalelo kuphela kwimpumelelo yakhe. Kuze kube yiminyaka emihlanu, iingcali zeengqondo zikhuthaza ukuphepha umdlalo apho ukhuphiswano luvela phakathi kwabantwana, kwaye injongo ephambili kukunqoba. Umntwana ufanele ujonge umdlalo, kwaye ungazami ukuhamba phambili komntu. Kungcono ubeke ingqalelo ekuphuculeni nasekuphuculweni kwengqondo komntwana.

Ukongezelela, zama ukufaka umntwana wakho isimo esifanelekileyo kwimpumelelo, ungagxininisi ekufikeleleni kwikhonkrithi umphumo, kunye nenkqubo ngokwayo. Ingane kufuneka ikwazi ukuba abazali bayadumisa okanye, ngokuchaseneyo, bayigxeki, kodwa izenzo zakhe nezenzo. Ukongezelela, kuyimfuneko ukufundisa umntwana ukuba abe ngumdlali ofanelekileyo - ukuba aziqhenyise ngoloyisa lwakhe, ngelixa engazivumeli iimvakalelo zabanye. Umntwana kufuneka aqonde ukuba naye ujongene nempumelelo yabahlobo bakhe kunye nabaqabane bakhe, akayikuphazamisa nantoni na isithunzi sakhe. Ncedisa umntwana ukuba abe nozinzo ngokomoya kwaye azithembe. Ndifundise ukuhleka iimpazamo zakho, kwaye naziphi na izimo zihlala zizolile kwaye zilungiswe ngokukhawuleza.

Uze ungalibali ukuba ufanele udumise kwaye ujezise umntwana ngokufanelekileyo.