Abazali abanothando bafuna ukunika abantwana babo izinto ezilungileyo: ukutya, iimpahla, amathoyizi. Bawajikeleze ngolwandle noluthando. Kodwa kwenzeka ukuba umama kunye nobaba bathengise i-whims ye-child, musa ukukhawuleza ukulahla nayiphi na into yakhe. Kwaye ke umtshutshisi omncinci ukhula engabonakali, efuna ngokunyanisekileyo oko akufunayo. Abazali bayamangalisa xa kwaye kwaye kutheni umntwana wabo sele. Kwaye umbuzo oyintloko, ukuba umntwana ophangiweyo usetsapho, yintoni enokuyenza?
Yintoni echithekayo?
Ukuhlanjululwa ekufundiseni ukujonga umntwana ogulayo. Ukuphangwa kwenzeka xa abazali bedibanisa umxholo othi "fundisa" kunye nomxholo othi "khuphula", oko kukuthi, ukugqoka nokutya. Uninzi umama kunye nabazali abanalo ixesha lokukhulula ukunika isizukulwana esincinane, ukusebenza ii-10 okanye ngaphezulu iiyure ngosuku. Ukuphangwa kubonakala nangendlela eyahlukileyo yabazali kunye noomkhulu noomkhulu kumfundo. Xa abantwana bephangiwe, bahluke ngobuncwane, ukuzingca, ukuzimela kubazali kunye nentando yabo. Imiphupho ayiyiyo imimoya engaqinisekanga kwaye ayayazi indlela yokwakha ubudlelwane kunye noontanga. Iintsana ezinjalo zisetyenziselwa ukufumana oko zifunayo kwaye ziyazi igama elithi "hayi" okanye "ayikho." Xa uzama ukungafuni ukuthenga omnye umatshini, iintombi ziqhubhisa iinyembezi, zibetha izandla phantsi, njl njl.
Indlela yokuvuselela umntwana owonakele?
Ukuzalisekisa le njongo, abazali kufuneka babe nesineke kwaye baqiniseke. Emva koko, umntwana uya kufuneka afundiswe ukuyeka yakhe iminqweno. Okokuqala, thetha nomntwana uze uchaze isizathu sokuba wenqabe. Chaza ukuba awuyi kuzalisekisa umnqweno wakhe, kungekhona ngenxa yokuba ungayithandi, kodwa kuba kukho isizathu esinjongo. Inokwenzeka ukuba, umntwana uya kuqonda kwaye aqoke amaqhinga angabi. Ukuba iinyembezi kunye nokukhala, musa ukutshintsha ukukhanya kwakho. Kulungile uye kwelinye igumbi okanye uvule i-TV ephakamileyo. Ngokuqinisekileyo lo mntwana uya kudinwa ngokumemeza, kwaye emva kwemizuzu engama-20 uya kuzincama. Umntwana kufuneka afunde ukwabelana ngeengcamango "ezingenakwenzeka" kwaye "unokukwazi." Sebenzisa amagama anjengokuthi "akunakwenzeka", "ungavumeli", ukuwabiza ngezwi eliqinileyo.
Akunakuyingozi njani umntwana?
Ukuba abazali abafuni ukuphazamisa abantwana babo, kufanelekile ukunamathela kwiziphakamiso ezithile:
- Musa ukwenzela umntwana oko angakwenza.
- Ukuhambelana nomgaqo "Hayi-ithetha ukuba hayi!" Njalo ngaphandle kokuvunyelwa.
- Ukukhuthaza ukufumana ukuziphatha okuhle, ukuzaliseka kwemisebenzi.
- Ukufakela isithembiso samanye amalungu omndeni ukuba angabandakanyeki ekubhubhiseni abantwana.