Ukususela ngomhla wokuqala wokubonakala kweemvuthu, uqala ukuhlola ihlabathi elizungezile kwaye ngokuthe ngcembe ujonge izakhono ezahlukeneyo ngokwasemzimbeni nangokomzwelo-kwengqondo. Abazali abaninzi banomdla kwimigangatho yokuphuhliswa komntwana, kwaye abanye banokugcina idayari ekhethekileyo kunye neirekhodi. Isenzo sokuqala esibalulekileyo sokusebenza ngokomzimba kukuvela kwenkimbinkimbi yezithombe kunye nokukwazi ukubamba intloko. Emva koko kuza ixesha xa umntwana eqala ukujika. Imfuno yokubambisana ivela kumntwana ngenxa yokunyuka komsebenzi: akayena umntwana osweleyo ongenangqondo, wayenenyanga enye, unomdla ekuhloliseni ihlabathi elikujikelezile. Kwaye unokwenza oku kuphela ngokuhambisa endaweni.
Izakhono zonyango ziyinkokeli ephakamileyo kwinqanaba lokuphuhliswa komntwana ongaphantsi komnyaka omnye. Okokuqala ubambe intloko, ngoko kuza ixesha elithile xa umntwana eqala ukuguquka, ehleli phantsi, emele, ehamba. Kwaye oku kuluhlu olunzima lokufunda lokufunda, lwenzeka ngonyaka wokuqala wokuphuhliswa kwayo.
Ekuqaleni, umntwana ubheka izinto ezizungezile, amathoyizi, aze aqale ukufikelela kubo ngesandla sakhe, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha akafikeli into efunwayo. Kule meko, umzuzu ufika xa umntwana ejika ehlangothini lwakhe ukuze athole umdlalo onomdla. Uqala ukufundisisa nomdla okhethekileyo wokufumana umzimba wakhe kwisithuba. Kwaye xa engaqali nje ekhangele idilesi, kodwa uqala ukubonisa izakhono zokuqala ezizimeleyo, ukujonga kwakhe kunye nommandla wokufunda umhlaba ojikelezayo ukhula.
Ngaba abantwana bajika ngaphi na? Ngaba kufuneka ufundise lo mntwana?
Akukho mvumelwano malunga nokuba umntwana uqala ukuguqulwa kangakanani, kuba umntwana ngamnye uyedwa ekuphuhlisweni kwakhe. Kukho isakhelo esithile sokuphuhliswa kweminyaka, xa ukukhutshwa kuthathwa njengona nto iphezulu kakhulu. Oku kwenzekayo kwiinyanga ezintathu ukuya ezintandathu. Umntwana osondayo uya kuba lula kwaye ukhawuleze ukuqala ukuguqula ngaphezu komntwana onomzimba omkhulu. Nangona kunjalo, ukukhutshwa kwinyanga ezimbini neenyanga ezintandathu kubonwa njengesiqhelo sophuhliso.
Ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba umntwana uphendukele kwelinye icala ngokulula kunomnye. Kule meko, abazali kufuneka bavuselele ukukhutshwa komntwana kunye nenye indlela yokuphuhliswa kwemimandla yomzimba.
Ukuba umntwana sele sele eguqule iinyanga ezili-6 ubudala, kwaye akakwazi ukujika, ungaqala ukujongana naye, usebenzise izakhono zokubamba.
Indlela yokufundisa umntwana ukuba aphephe?
Into yokuqala yokuyenza yinto ekhethekileyo yokuzivocavoca, ukuze umntwana afunde ukujika. Umntu omdala wenza njengesikhokelo somntwana kwaye unokunceda ekuqondeni ukukhwabanisa. Ukwenza oku, umama kufuneka abeke ithoyilo kumntwana kwicala, ukuze lithele kuye. Unokumnceda ngelo xesha, uqhube umlenze wakhe okanye udibanise umgca ngendlela efanelekileyo. Ngethuba lo mdlalo, kufuneka uguqule ngokukhawuleza indawo yendawo yokudlala ephuma kwelinye icala, elinye livela kumntwana. Kubalulekile ukuba umntwana ngexesha elifanayo ufumene iimvakalelo ezintle, eziza kuqinisa impumelelo yakhe ekufumaneni ubuchule bezithuthi. Kubalulekile ukukhuthaza nokudumisa umntwana, ukuze aphumelele kwaye wayesazi ukuba yonke into yayisebenza kuye. Uncedo olunjalo oluvela kumama luyimfuneko kakhulu.
Yintoni enye ongayenza ukuze uguqule umntwana? Ukufundisa umntwana ubuchule bokubhikisha, unokukwenza oku okulandelayo:
- izenzo ezikhethekileyo zentsasa (ukuxuba-ukuhluthwa kwezibambiso, ukuguquguquka-ukwandisa imilenze);
- Ukusilalisa umzimba (ukuxubha, ukugubungela izibamba, imilenze, umva kunye nesisu).
- Iinkqubo zamanzi zigalelo ekuqiniseni izihlunu zezandla kunye nomlenze wesibeletho.
Amaphupha abalulekileyo
Ungafundisi ukubetha umntwana xa engekho kwimoya, ukhathele okanye ulambile, njengoko oku kungenza ukuba abe nemizwa ephazamisayo.
Abazali kufuneka bahlale bephapheme kwaye bajonge ukhuseleko lokufumana umntwana kwiindawo ezingenakubalwa, ukuze kuphephe ukuwa nokulimala.
Kufuneka kukhunjulwe ukuba umntwana wakho ukhula ngabanye. Kwaye kungakhathaliseki ukuba uphendukela kangakanani, le yinqanaba lakhe lophuhliso, apho kufuneka adlule khona. Futhi ungakhathazeki kakhulu ukuba umntwana unqabe ukuguqula kwiinyanga ezi-5-6. Kuza kufika umzuzwana kwaye uya kugubha ngokukhawuleza ixesha apho umntwana engasebenzi kwaye kwakulula ukuba agqoke okanye ambeke elele.