Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuxelela umntwana igama elithi "akunakwenzeka" nendlela yokwenza ngokuchanekileyo?
Kwimpilo yomntwana, amagama athi "unokukwazi" kwaye "akakwazi" kufuneka abekhona ngamazinga ahlukeneyo kwaye okokuqala kufuneka kube ngamaxesha amaninzi, ngelixa lesibini kwinani elincinci. Ukuba umntwana kuzo zonke iinyathelo uya kubanjelwa ngqununu ye "cha", ngoko ubomi bakhe buya kulahlekelwa ngumbala kwaye umntwana uyayeka ukuvuya kwizinto ezintsha, iimpawu zakhe aziyi kuhlalisana.
Iimpawu okanye izithintelo, ngokuqinisekileyo, ziyimfuneko - konke oku malunga nokusongela ubomi kunye nempilo yomntwana. Awunakuchukumisa ibhodlo elitshisayo, thabatha amayeza kunye nomdlalo, ukhuphukela kwindawo yokuphuma, ugijime ngaphaya kwendlela kwindawo engafanelekanga kunye nezinto ezinjalo. Kule miba, ukunyaniseka kubalulekile, kodwa umntwana kufuneka achaze konke oku kungabi ngokukhala, kodwa ngeengxabano ezinengqiqo, ngamanye amaxesha uziphawule ukuba abe nesiphumo sokungathobeli.
Ngoko, umzekelo, ibhodlo elitshisayo kufuneka linikezelwe umntwana ukuba azame ukusebenzisa ipeni ukuze amthinte ukuba akhuphukele esitofu. Ewe, ayiyi kubilisa, kodwa iqondo lokushisa alimele likhululeke. Oku kukusemncinci kakhulu, ukuze bakhumbule isifundo ixesha elide.
Abantwana abakhulileyo, abaza kuqala ngokuzimelela ukuya esikolweni ngokukhawuleza ukuba baye esikolweni, akufanele bazi kuphela imithetho yeprayimari, kodwa bawasebenzise ebomini.
Ngelishwa, sisoloko sibona imeko xa inja okanye ikati ibethwa yimoto. Umntwana uyakubona kwaye kule mzuzu kuyimfuneko ukumxelela ukuba inja iyadlula ngendlela ngendlela efanelekileyo, ngoko, yahlala isaphila. Lo mzekelo nangona akuyona into engenakonakalisa, kodwa iyasebenza kakhulu.
Ngendlela echanekileyo ukuchazela umntwana, oko akunakwenzeka ntoni?
Eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu, abantwana abazange basabele ngokumemeza ngokukrakra "Awukwazi!", Kodwa ekutheni uxolo, ithandi lokuthanda uxolo apho kuthethwa khona amagama angavunyelwe. Indlela ephumelelayo kwaye eqinisekisiwe - iya kwi-whisper. Ukuba umntwana uyamemeza kwaye akafuni ukuphulaphula nayiphi na into, endaweni yokumemeza, zama ukukhalaza endlebeni yakhe ukuba ufuna ukumbonisa ntoni ngezwi elililileyo, elililileyo. Abantwana nje beqaqa phambili ezindlebeni zabo zonke izinto ezimbi, ezibandakanya izibambiso. Ukuba kwixesha elizayo bekungekho iingxaki kule nto, kunye nabantwana ukususela kwiminyaka yobudala kuyimfuneko ukuqhuba incoko kwinto enokwenzeka kwaye oko kungenakwenziwa.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba sizama njani ukucacisa igama elithi "akunakwenzeka" kumntwana, ukuba ngabazali ngokwabo baphulaphula imithetho yabo, ngoko kuyisilumko ukulindela ukuba abantwana babo bafezekise. Ngokomzekelo, ukulinda ukukhanya okufanelekileyo ekukhanyeni kwizibane zendlela, ngamanye amaxesha sibaleka ngaphaya komgwaqo, ukuba sikhawuleza. Abantwana, abajonge nathi, nabo, abanakuzilinda zabo, kwaye oku kunomngcipheko wobomi.
Ukukhulisa umntwana wakho, kufuneka udibanise kunye nokuzimela, ukuze ube ngumzekelo wokwenene kumntwana, ofuna ukuxelisa. Abantwana baya kukopisha umama noyise, kunye nokuziphatha kwintsapho yabo, kodwa bavumeleke ukuba babe sisimo sethu esihle. Ukuba awuqondi indlela yokuchazela umntwana omncinci into enokwenzeka kwaye into engayenzekanga kubantwana, xa efuna into encinane, uzama ukuba ungakhathazeki, kodwa ukucinga. Ngokomzekelo, xa umntwana engafuni ukugqoka iimpahla ezifudumeleyo, kwaye kubanda kwisitalato kwaye abakwazi ukwenza ngaphandle kwabo,
Ngoko ke, ekugqibeleni, saqonda ukuba "akunakwenzeka", oko kukuthi, imingcipheko enkulu, kufuneka kube ncinane. Imeko xa kunokwenzeka ukuba uguqule ngokukhawuleza nayiphi na umzuzu sele ukhona. Ukuba umntwana ufanele alale embhedeni ongama-21.00 ngaphandle kokunyaniseka, ngoko xa kufika iindwendwe okanye uNyaka omtsha uza, lo mqathango kufuneka uphakanyiswe okwesikhashana. Kukho nawuphi na umzekelo, abazali kufuneka bachaze zonke iimvume zabo kumntwana, mhlawumbi ngaphezu kweyodwa, de kube kubekho umphumo ozinzileyo.