Kwiminyaka emininzi, impikiswano ayizange ixhomekeke nokuba ngaba ubuhlobo phakathi kwendoda nomfazi bufumaneka. Abaninzi bakholelwa ukuba ixesha elide ukugcina ubudlelwane obunjalo akunakwenzeka, kuba baya kugqiba kungekudala okanye kamva ebhedini. Kodwa mhlawumbi, awuyi kutshabalalisa ubungane okanye ezi ngcamango azihambelani?
Ngaba kukho ubulili obuhle?
Bathi abo baqabane bayonwabile apho abathandi bezona zihlobo ezilungileyo. Yaye oku kunjalo ngokwenene, ubudlelwane abuyakhelwe kuphela ekukhanukeni. Kodwa ngaba le ngxelo echaseneyo, ngaba uyinyaniso yokuba awuyi kutshabalalisa ubuhlobo bokwenene kunye nesondo? Uninzi lweengqondo zikholelwa ukuba oku kuya kwenzeka. Ekugqibeleni, ubudlelwane buya kungena kwisigaba sothando okanye ukuyeka ngokupheleleyo. Ngoko impendulo kumbuzo wobulili bobuhlobo - ikhona, nangona kunjalo, imfutshane kakhulu. Masibone ngokucacileyo ukuba kutheni le nto yenzekayo.
Ukwabelana ngesondo akusithinteli ubuhlobo!
Abo bangacingi ngolu hlobo bangalunganga njengoko kubonakala ngathi ukuqala. Ubulili bobuhlobo bunamathuba amaninzi, okwenza kube mnandi.
- umzekelo, abahlobo akufanele bazame ukubukeka kakuhle emehlweni abo, ukuba bafune indawo efanayo - sele bevaliwe;
- xa abahlobo bexesha ngalinye belala ngesondo, akukho namnye wabo oceba iziganeko ezizayo, kungekho mvakalelo yothando phakathi kwabo;
- Ngethuba lobudlelwane obusondeleyo, abahlobo banokuphumla, kuba akukho ukoyika ukungaphumeleli. Nangona kwenzeka, baya kuhleka nje ngongoma wokuzama ukuphumelela, kodwa oku akuyi kuphazamisa ubudlelwane babo nganoma iyiphi indlela.
Awunakonakalisa isondo ngesondo, uya kutshabalalisa ngesondo sakhe
Buza ukuba kutheni kubaluleke kangaka, kuba ngaphezulu kuchazwe imodeli efanelekileyo yezocansi? Inyaniso yolu mbandela kukuba lo ngumzekelo ongasebenzelanga ixesha elide ekusebenzeni. Kwaye ziziphi izizathu:
- abantu abathi isondo asiyithintelo ebuhlotsheni, musa ukucinga ngento enye inomdla kakhulu - ukutshata kobuhlobo akunanto ngaphandle kokwaneliseka kwemimiselo yezinto zomzimba ngeendleko zomnye umntu. Ekubeni kunqatshelwe nayiphi na imvakalelo yothando, amaqabane asebenzisana, njengoko beya kwenza kunye nentombazana (intombazana) esetyenziswe ngokuhlwa. Ndixelele, ungayithi igama lomntu osetyenzisileyo?
- sonke singabantu abaphilileyo, kwaye sifuna ukufudumala nokuqonda, amadoda namabhinqa amaninzi afuna ukulala ngesondo nomntu othandekayo, kungekhona nje umhlobo. Ngaloo nto, akumangalisi ukuba, nangona kukho konke ukuthintela, kwelinye lamalingani (ngokuphindaphindiweyo intombazana), ngexesha elide, kukho imvakalelo yothando. Ewe, ukuba kuthelekisana, ke indlela eya kwintsapho eyonwabileyo ivulekile. Kwaye ukuba akunjalo? Oku kunokwenzeka, kuya kubakho ukuchithwa okupheleleyo kwanoma luphi ubudlelwane;
- Ewe, kunokwenzeka ukuba xa abahlobo balala ngesondo, kwaye abanakho ukuvakalelwa omnye nomnye. Kodwa uvakalelo lwenkolo
ukusondelana, okunxulumene nomntu, kwakhona kuyalala; - umntu akanakunceda ukuthetha malunga nedumela, isondo nomhlobo kunokuphazamisa ukwakha ubudlelwane kunye nomnye umlingane. Ngoku awukwazi ukusho ukuthi "lo ngumhlobo nje, unjengomntakwethu omncinci", akukho mntu uya kukukholelwa, nayiphi na ifowuni yomntu osebenza naye uya kubangela ukuqhuma komona.
Njengoko uyakubona, imiphumo emibi yesondo ngobudlelwane inokuba nzima kakhulu, ngoko ngaphambi kokuba uthathe isigqibo malunga nokuthatha isigqibo malunga naloo nto, khumbula okokukhokelela kwisini sobungane, ucinge ukuba uyayifuna le miphumo.