I-Homophobia

Ukuqwalasela ukuba kwixesha lethu ingxaki yobungqingili iba yinkinga yomlinganiselo weeplanethi, kukho abaxhamli bezobudlelwane bezesondo ngokuqhelekileyo, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo oku kuquka ukuvela kwezinto ezinjalo njengepropaganda yokuxolisa abantu.

I-Homophobia yindlela ekhohlakeleyo eyenziwa ngamaqabane angama-homosexual ngendlela yokumangalela abo bantu abaxhasayo bokuziphatha kunye nemilinganiselo yentsapho yemveli. E-Rashiya, umthetho ngokubhekiselele ekuzileni kwabantu ukhuluma ngomnyaka we-1706 ukuqaliswa nguPetros I yecandelo lolwaphulo-mthetho lobulili, nangona nangethuba lika-Ivan Eliyikrakra le nkwenkwezi yachithwa malunga neTsar eyayibonisa ukuthanda izinto ezingaqhelekanga.

Ngomnyaka we-1972, ukuzithemba kwabantwana kwakuchazwa njengoloyiko lokuqhagamshelana nabantu abangaqhelekanga, kwaye ukuba sithetha ngabasini basini ngokwawo, oko kuthetha ukuthatyathwa kwabo. Kubantu abanjalo, ukuzithemba ngabantwana kungabangela ingxaki yangaphakathi xa ilahlekelwa ukulawulwa kwesoyiko kunye nemifanekiso abayibangelayo. Ukulahleka kolawulo olunjalo livela kwithuba lokungabaza kwiimeko eziqhelekileyo zokuqhelaniswa kwayo, nanko kukhula, imifanekiso iqala ukuhlasela umdali wayo.

Izizathu zokuhlala

Ulwahlulo lwamazwe ngamazwe lwezifo zengqondo aluboni ubungqingili ngesifo. Abantwana abakhuliswa ngamabini abesilisa abesilisa abafana nabo baya kuba ngabalingqingili ngaphezu koonyana abakhuliswa kwiintsapho zemveli. Abantu abangqingili abafunanga amalungelo, amalungelo okhethekileyo ezopolitiko kunye neenzuzo. Uvelaphi ukuhlala ekhaya?

Izibalo zibonisa ukuba isikhundla sabantu abaninzi asithathi hlangothi kwaye abantu abangama-20% kuphela babonisa isimo sengqondo sokuzingela abantu. Kule meko, ezi ndawo zilandelayo ziyabonakala:

• isikhundla esinokubekezela esibona ukufaneleka kwengqondo, yentlalo kunye nokuziphatha kunye nokulingana kwabameli bezobugcisa bendabuko;
• isimo sengqondo esifanelekileyo sokungabikho komntu, xa isimo sengqondo sabantwana besantlalontle kunye nabangqingili sithathwa njengento engonelanelekanga okanye esongela uluntu (bafuna ukukhutshwa kwamalungelo abo, unyango okanye ukutshutshiswa kwecala);
• indawo yokungathathi hlangothi, oko kukuthi, ukungabikho kwanoma nayiphi na inzala kwingxaki okanye ukungathandi ukuveza imbono yakhe;
• isikhundla sokubambisana, oko kukuthi, isikhundla esichaphazela ngokuxhomekeke kwingcaciso ekhoyo, imeko yakho yemeko kunye nemeko.
• iqela elikhethekileyo limelelwe ngabantu abagcina isimo salo, oko kukuthi, abo banelisekile imeko ekhoyo (ukungabikho koxinzelelo kunye nokungacaluli).

Iimvavanyo zokuzithengisa abantu zibonisa ukuba ingavuleka kwaye ifihliwe. Ifihliweyo ibonakalisa ukuba umntu uyalahla ubuhlobo bobulili obufanayo, ubona ukuba uyaphambukiswa, kodwa akayi kubonakalisa ukunganeliseki kwakhe okanye athathe nayiphi na inyathelo elisebenzayo. Kodwa, ngelishwa, kukho abantu abathandabuzayo abangenakunqikaza ukuthetha ukuba abantu abathandana nabo besini kufuneka bachithe, ukubulala umntu nje ngokuba uyamthanda omnye umntu wesini esinye. Kwaye into edabukisayo kukuba i-homophobes enjalo ikhona kwaye iyakwenza ngokunyanisekileyo. Kukho iziganeko zokuzibulala kubantwana besikolo, ukudlwengulwa kwama-lesbians ukwenzela ukulungiswa koqhelwano lwabo, ukubulala abantu abathandanayo ngenxa yenzondo kwaye oku akude kumacala athile.

Ungayinceda njani ukulahla?

Lahla ukuzithengela abantu umntu onokukwazi kuphela xa engadingi ukukhusela okukhuselekileyo. Ngaphandle kwe-psychoanalysis apha kuyimfuneko. Kubalulekile ukuba ukhumbule ukuba umntu ngamnye umntu onokuzondla umntu ohlala kuyo, unalo ilungelo, kodwa kuphela xa engayikhohlwa umgaqo wokuba inkululeko yelaki yakhe kufuneka iphele apho kuphuma inkululeko yomphumo womnye.