Uhlazo lomntu othandekayo luhlala lusizi, luhlungu kwaye luhlambalaza. Kakade ke, akubona bonke abafazi abasabela ngokukhawuleza kwiphankaso ekhohlo ukuya kwesokudla, kodwa ininzi iba ngumsindo. Ngaba ndimele ndixolele ukutshatyalaliswa kwendoda yam: isiluleko sengqondo sengqondo kule ngxelo iya kubalwa kule nqaku.
Ngaba kufanelekile ukuxolela ukutshatyalaliswa komyeni wakhe?
Ngokucacileyo lo mbuzo awukwazi ukuphendulwa. Ukuba ulwalamano lude lude luphelile, kwaye othembekileyo akasayi kuhamba ngenxa yokuba kulungele ukuba ahlale emakhaya amabini okanye ukuba umfazi unamathele kuye ngento ethile, umzekelo, abantwana, lixesha lokubukeka ngenyameko kwimeko kwaye baqonde ukuba kuphela uhlazisa umfazi. Ukuba umntu uyamthanda ngokwenene, akayi kuvumela abathembekileyo ukuba bafunde malunga neentlanga zakhe, kwaye ukuba oko kwenzeka, uya kucela ukuxolelwa kuzo zonke iindlela ezikhoyo. Ukucinga malunga nokuba ufanele uxolele ukuxolela, kufuneka uhlalutye ubuchule bakho.
Ukuba ukugxekwa kubangelwa kakhulu kwaye umfazi uyaqonda ukuba uya kuhlala ekhumbula le nto kwaye nakumathuba onke ukuhlambalaza abathembekileyo, kungcono ukuba ungazami ukubamba inkomfa ephukileyo ndawonye. Ukucinga malunga nokuba kukufanelekile ukuxolela umntu ngokunyaniseka , kuyimfuneko ukuqwalasela isantya sokuguquka kwakhe. Ukuba oko kwakunye, kwaye akaxhasi uxhaso olongezelelayo kunye nomlingani, efuna ukuxolela ityala lakhe, unokuxolelwa. Nangona kukho iimeko apho umntu ebudlelwane obude kunye nomnye umfazi, kodwa uyaqonda ukuba akukho mntu ungcono kunowesifazane kwaye ubuyela kwintsapho.
Ukuba kukho nayiphi na into engathandabuzekiyo malunga nokuba ungamxolelanga umyeni wakho emva kokunyelisa, ungazinika ixesha lokucinga, ukuqonda yonke into, ngelixa ukhangele izenzo ezithembekileyo: oko akwenzayo ukuze umfazi amxolele. Ukuba uyaqiniseka ukuba akayi kuhamba naphi na, akukho nto iya kwenziwa, ngoko kufuneka uyenze ukhathazeke, ukwesaba ukuhlala ngaphandle kwentsapho uze ube nethuba lokuvuselela ubudlelwane .