Nangona ufumene into enjalo kwiminyaka emininzi edlulileyo, oku akuthethi ukuba ingxaki yothando olungenakunqwenelekayo unokuphinde ikhumbuze ngokukuhlungu. Kungathatha ixesha, kwaye uya kuba nexesha lokufumana intsapho kunye nabantwana. Kodwa ngokukhawuleza uza kubuya kwakhona. Uthando olungenakutshitshiswa lunokwakhe kwengqondo, kwaye ukulukhupha, ngokuchanekileyo, ukusuka kuloo mivo, akulula kangangoko kubonakala ngathi. Makhe sibone ukuba kutheni.
Uthando kunye nendlala
Nawuphi na umvakalelo, ukubuyisela ngenye indlela enye indawo, ithatha isikhundla esiphambili "entloko" yethu. Umgaqo ophezulu usekelwe ekumhoxisweni kwawo, ukugqiba. Ngoko, umzekelo, ukuvakalelwa yindlala kuchukumisa umntu ukuba ahlale ecinga malunga nento afuna ukuyidla. Ngaphambi kokuba le mfuno iyaneliseke, umntu uya kufuna ukutya, uya kuhlala ecinga ngokutya. Kule meko, kukho iindlela ezimbini zokuphuma (ukugqitywa) kweyona ndawo. Umzekelo, waxelelwa ukuba uphunyelelwe. Uxinezelekile, unqatshiswe kwaye ulahlekelwe ngokupheleleyo kwiindaba ezinjalo. Kucacile ukuba uyayeka ukucinga ngokutya. Omnye olawulayo ungatshintsha omnye. Lo uphumelelo lwangaphandle. Imveliso yangaphakathi yeyona nto iphezulu kukuba ukwaneliseka. Kwimeko yokulamba, ukugqitywa kwangaphakathi kwesi sigqeba kuya kuba loo mntu uya kudla aze aneliseke.
Uthando, njengento ebalaseleyo, ludinga ukuhoxiswa kwaye lufuna ukugqiba. Ngako oko, ingxaki yendlela yokufumana uthando olungathandabuzekiyo luya kucace ngakumbi. Uthando olungabikho ngenxa yokungafani (ukuxolisa kwi-pun) alinakho ukuphela kwangaphakathi. Indoda okanye ibhinqa yasabela kwintlungu yokungaphumeleli. Ukungayifumana impendulo kwimvakalelo yabo, umntu akanako ukufumana ukwaneliseka kokuphambili kwayo.
Umphefumlo ongaphandle wothando oluphambili kukusindiswa kwimeko kwaye, ngandlela-thile, iyeza elinokophelo lomthandi onobuhlungu. Ukuveliswa kwangaphandle kuhambelana notshintsho kwintando yothando, oko kukuthi, umfazi (indoda) ulwa nothando nomnye umntu (omnye umfazi). Kodwa, njengoko kwathiwa ekuqaleni, ukudibana nomntu onothando olungathandabuzekiyo kuya kuhlala kubangele ubuhlungu obangelwa yimvakalelo yothando olungathandabuzekiyo. Umntu akahluphekanga ngumntu ongafuni ukwabelana naye ngeemvakalelo. Uyabandezeleka ngenxa yeemvakalelo, ngenxa yeemvakalelo zakhe, uzililela. Kodwa akukho nto.
Masikhululwe izikhumbuzo
Yintoni enokuyenza kunye nendlela yokujamelana nothando olungathandabuzekiyo, oluvame ukukhumbuza ngokwalo-umbuzo othabatha abaninzi. Uthando olungaphelelanga lithetha ukuba iimvakalelo azitholanga i-outlet yangaphakathi, ukulungelelana kunye nokuwaneliseka. Ukupheleliswa kwangaphandle kwothando olungenakunqwenelekayo, i-alas, ayiluncedo.
Ukususela kwimvakalelo engeyiyo-mva kuya kunceda ukulahla ixesha. Njengoko bethetha, yonke into iyadlula, kwaye oku kuya kudlula. Ukuqonda ngokubanzi kuya kusinceda siphuthume le nkqubo.
Ngoko, ukuba oko kunokwenzeka, ngoko kufuneka udibane kwakhona kunye nento yokuthandana ngokungaxelwanga. Oku kuyimfuneko ukuze ukhangele umntu "ngendlela entsha." Kuphela nje kukho imeko enye - ukususela kumzuzwana wokungaphumeleli komthando, ubuncinane bonyaka kufuneka kudlule, ngaphandle koko, awuyi kubona nantoni na entsha kwaye iya kuxhasa kuphela iintlungu zakho.
Xa ubhekisele kumntu obengenalo ukungazivalelwanga, xa uthe waxoxisana nalo mntu, nawe, mhlawumbi, uya kubuza umbuzo: "Yaye ndiyifumeleni kuyo? ..". Inyaniso kukuba xa uthando lusithatha, sinika into yokuba sinothando ngeempawu esinokuzibona kuyo. Siyicinga loo mntu. Ewe, xa sidibana, ekugqibeleni sivula amehlo ethu. Khumbula, uvakalelwa iimvakalelo kungekhona kumntu ngokwakhe, kodwa kwiimbulelo zakhe, kwizikhumbuzo zeemvakalelo (ukukhanga, ukunyamezela, imfesane, ukubandezeleka). Bonke abantu, nantoni na into abangayithethayo, ngamanye amaxesha bathanda ukuhlupheka baze bazizisole. Mhlawumbi, kuyimfuneko ukuba sive ukuhluke phakathi kokonwaba nokuphelelwa yithemba.
Ndifuna ukushwankathela konke oku ngasentla ngegama elilandelayo malunga nothando olungathandabuzekiyo: "Ukuthandwa akunjalo ukungafezeki, kungekhona uthando - oko kukubi." Yenza izigqibo.