Kukho iimeko xa ubuhlobo kunye nomfana engabongezeli, kwaye kufuneka uwagqibe ngokucophelela. Nangona kunjalo, oku akulula, kuba umfana unenjongo echasene ngokupheleleyo kwaye ulungele ukulwa ngamanye amaxesha de kube sekupheleni. Ukongezelela, ukugatywa kwentombazana enokuqhubeka nobudlelwane obunxulumana naye kunokuqwalaselwa nguye njengenxeba yezenzo ezingakumbi. Emva kwakho konke, amadoda ngohlobo lwendalo - abazingeli, kwaye banomdla omkhulu, ukuba intombazana iyanqoba.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, kwimeko enjalo, amantombazana akhangele ukuba angamthabatha umfana ukuze angakhubeki. Kwiimeko ezininzi, iindlela zokucetyiswa zifezekisa iziphumo zazo. Nangona kunjalo, ngamanye amaxesha umfana angacatshiswa, nokuba ngaba kuchazwa ngcaciso yonke nangengqiqo kunye nococeko. Kule meko, ungakhathazeki, kuba yonke into yenziwe.
Kubuhlungu kangakanani ukuthunga umntu?
Iingcali zengqondo zincoma loo myalelo wezenzo, indlela yokulahla umfana, ngaphandle kokucasula:
- Kufuneka ukuba ukhethe indawo efanelekileyo yengxoxo. Akukho imfuneko yokuqhuba intetho phambi kwabantu abangagunyaziswanga, kuba oku kunokuphazamisa ingqondo yomntu oselula. Ayikho into ebalulekileyo kwintetho yendlu yomntu. Kuya kuba yinto echanekileyo yokubamba ingxoxo kwindawo kawonkewonke, kodwa kwindawo apho kungekho mntu uya kuphazamisa: epakini, kwi-cafe.
- Qalisa ingxoxo engcono ngokuchazwa kwezici ezintle zomlingiswa womfana. Kufanelekile ukuthetha ukuba unobungqina obuninzi, kwaye ungumhlobo omhle. Ukuba ulungele ukuqhubeka uba ngumhlobo naye okanye ukuthetha kuphela, kodwa awukwazi ukunika oko akukulindele kuwe, kuba iimvakalelo zakho zithe cwaka.
- Kufuneka ukuba uthethe ngaphandle kwesithunzi sokuqhawula kunye nobubi. Wonke amagama makangabonakali kwaye ayaqondakala.
- Ukuba kunzima ukuqhuba incoko, ungabhala ileta, enokuthi iqale kwakhona ngamanqaku afanelekileyo.
- Ukuba lo mntu uqala nje ukujongana, kwaye ungacwangcanga naluphi ulwalamano naye, unokumxelela ukuba sele unomfana oselula naye onobungane obuhle.
- Emva kokuba incoko iyenze, qha ga mshelana nomntu kufuneka incitshiswe ukuze angabikho na mathemba.
- Ungasebenzisa indlela eyinkimbinkimbi, njengendlela yokugcoba kakuhle umfana. Ukwenza oku, cela umhlobo wakho ukuba adlale kunye nawe, uzenza ngathi ungumtshato. Ngelo xesha, awuyi ku funeka uthethe kwaye uchaze nantoni na, kuba yonke into iya kucacisa ngaphandle kwamazwi.
- Indlela eyona ndlela isebenzayo, indlela enokumthabatha ngayo ukuthatha umfana, ukungakhathaleli. Kwanele ukuziphatha ngokuzithelekileyo, cwaka, uzaliswe kwiintlanganiso kwaye ungayixhasi nayiphi na ingxoxo, ukwenzela ukuba umdla uya ekudleni.
Indlela yokuhlobisa umntu ngokuthobeka?
Ukungaphumeleli ngokuthe tye kukuvumela ukuba ube nobuhlobo obuhle kunye nomfana kwaye ungamhlazisi. Unokwenza ngala magama:
- ungumntu omhle, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo uya kuba nentombi ethandekayo;
- Iimvakalelo zam zithe cwaka, ngoko andinakukwazi kunye nawe;
- Ndiyathemba ukuba awuyi kukhubekiswa, ngenxa yokuba intukuthelo yinkalo yabuthathaka;
- Andinalo ilungelo lokugcina wena kum, kuba andinalo uthando kuwe;
- siza kuphuka kangcono, ngoko unokufumana umlingane wakho womntu;
- Ngoku ndifuna ukuba ndodwa, ngoko ndikucela ukuba ushiye ubomi bam;
- Sifanele siphule, kuba awukwazi ukungiphatha njengomhlobo, kodwa andinako ngaphezu komhlobo;
- Makhe sihlale kunye nawe kakuhle, ngaphandle kokucaciswa kunye nokuhlambalaza;
- Ndiyakuphatha kakuhle, ngoko andifuni ukukucaphukisa uze ucele ukuba sihlukane nje;
- Intliziyo yam ayikwazi ukuphindaphinda, ngoko kungcono ungalichitha ixesha kum kwaye uzame ukufumana isiqingatha sakho sesibini.
Akusoloko kunokwenzeka ukuthunga umfana onohloniphekileyo. Kwezinye iimeko, ukuqina nokuqina kuyafuneka ukuba loo nto ibone ukuba le ntombazana ayihlose ukuba ibe nantoni na.