Ayikho imfihlelo yokuba kuyo nayiphi na iqoqo, ngaba itlasi yeklasi, okanye iqela labafundi, kuya kubakho abo bantu banomdla wothando kunye nokuthandwa, kunye nabo bangabakho kule "nxalenye yezintandokazi." Kodwa, luhlobo luni lommeleli wesigqibo esihle sabantu asifuni ukwazi indlela yokuba yintombazana epholileyo, ukuba mnandi kumadoda kunye nabahlobo abaninzi. Ukuze iphupha lizaliseke, kufuneka ufunde imithetho embalwa kuphela kwaye usebenze okuncane.
Indlela yokuba yintombazana epholileyo?
Ngoko, into yokuqala okumele uyenze ukuzijonga yona ngaphandle. Kufuneka nje ukugqamisa amandla abo kunye nobuthathaka. Into ephambili ayenzi iphutha eliqhelekileyo, musa ukugqithisa, ungagqithisi-udumise, kodwa ungagxininisa ngoluvo lokuba akukho nto ikhangayo kuwe.
Unokwenza uluhlu kunye ne-pluses yakho kunye ne-minuses, ngoko uhlalutye yonke into uze uzame ukujonga ngokwaso ngokuvela ngaphandle.
Xa kuhlalutya kubalulekile ukuchonga izixhobo ezininzi, umntu kufuneka ahlule ngokwahlukileyo kunye nokungahambi kakuhle kwembonakalo, imfundo, ukukwazi ukuziphatha kunye neempawu zobuntu bakhe. Le nyathelo lokuqala ongayenza ngayo intombazana epholileyo, kwaye ufumane abahlobo abatsha kunye nabalandeli, ngenxa yokuzithemba nokuzithemba.
Emva kokuba uludwe lweempawu kunye neziphene ziya kuqulunqwa, sifuna ukugqamisa oko kufuneka ukuba utshintshwe kwindawo yokuqala. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba intombazana ihlazeka ukuthetha nabantu ngenxa yomntu "ongaphelelekanga", ngoko kufuneka umntu afunde indlela yokukhetha iingubo "zokunene", aze adlale imidlalo, aze afunde iincwadi zobugcisa kunye nokulwa neentloni kwinkampani. Ukunyamezela kunye nomsebenzi, yinto eya kukunceda ube yintombazana epholileyo esikolweni, kwaye ufumane ukuzithemba ngamakhono akho. Ngeke kube lula kule ndlela, kuyimfuneko ukudibanisa ukuba kuya kuthatha umsebenzi omde kunye noomsebenzi.
Indlela yokuba yintombazana epholile kakhulu?
Xa le nto intombazana isele ikwazi ukuzibandakanya kuyo, kuyimfuneko ukuqhubeka kwisinyathelo esilandelayo, kufuneka siqale ukuthetha nabantu. Khangela kwaye uzakuqonda ukuba abo bantu abanokukwazi ukuthandana nabantu abanomdla ngokuqhelekileyo banokuzonwabisa ngokuthandwa ngabantu, banokuvalelwa ngabantu, babelane ngeminqweno yabo. Ukuba umntu akakwazi ukukwenza oko, ngoko kukuhle kangakanani, ukuba yinto epholile kakhulu, nokuba yintoni enokuthi, ayiyi kusebenza.
Ukuze ube mnxibelelwano omnandi, kufuneka ukhumbule kwaye ufunde indlela yokusebenzisa imithetho emininzi.
- Ukwazi ukuphulaphula abantu. Kwaye akukhona nje ukuphazamisa umnxibelelwano , kuyimfuneko ukubuza imibuzo kumntu, enomdla, engathandanga umdla, ukuphulaphula iindaba zakhe namava.
- Khangela ukuba zeziphi izihloko ezithandekayo kubahlobo bakho kwaye uzame ukuzifunda. Akukho nto embi ngaphezu kokuba umnxibelelwano engathandi ukuphulaphula nokuthetha ngezinto ezithile abantu abakhathalelayo. Ngoko ke, ukuthetha ngokudityanisiweyo kuya kufuneka ukuba ufunde
izihloko ezithandayo abahlobo bakho. - Funda ukunqoba umqobo kunye nokuxelela okuthile malunga nawe kunye neminqweno yakho. Khumbula umgaqo "wegolide" woqhagamshelwano - 30% yentetho kufuneka ixelelwe ngawe, i-70% yexesha lokuphulaphula umnxibelelwano.
Qiniseka ukuba ufunde iincwadi ngokubhekiselele kwimiqondo yengqondo, umzekelo, unokuqala ngokufanayo noDale Carnegie. Kukho iinkcukacha ezichaziweyo, zeziphi iimpendulo ezisetyenziselwa ukugcinwa komdla we-interlocutor, indlela yokufunda ukubuza imibuzo kunye nabantu. Into ephambili, khumbula ukuba akukho ncwadana inokukunceda uze uzinqobe kwaye uqale ukusebenzisa isicelo esiluncedo ngokusebenza.