Kubonakala ngathi zonke iintombazana ziyazi indlela yokudlala nomfana, kodwa abanye bafuna ukufunda indlela yokwenza okulungileyo. Ukucacisa ukuba abameli bobulili obuhlukile basabela ekuthandaneni ngothando njengokuba bengafuni. Ukususela ekufundeni indlela yokudlala ngothando nomfana, ngaba le mdlalo ongenatyala kufuneka uqale ngendlela ethile? Enyanisweni, akukho mntu unokunika iingcebiso ezicacileyo - bonke abantu bahlukileyo, ngoko ke basabela ngendlela eyahlukileyo kwiindlela zethu. Futhi musa ukulingisa nabani na, kuba ngamnye umfazi unentshisekelo yobuntu bakhe, ngubani ofuna izitampu ezichukumisiweyo? Kodwa, nangona konke oku, kukho iinkolelo ezininzi kangangokuba ngamaxesha onke uncedisa abafazi ukuba banike umqondiso onomdla kuye.
Indlela yokufunda ukudlala ngothando kunye nabafana?
- Kuye kwathiwa ngasentla ukuba ukudlala ngothando ngumdlalo ongeke uphelise ngesitya, konke kuxhomekeke kwiinjongo ozibekela zona. Kwaye ukuqala ukudlala ngothando nomntu, kufuneka uqikelele ngokucacileyo ukuba ufuna ntoni kulo mbandela weembono - ngesondo okanye ufuna nje ukudlala ngothando ukuze uchithe ixesha, uhlawule ngemvakalelo emihle (inzala yesini esahlukileyo isebenza bhetele kunele tshokoleta), njl njl. Kwaye sele sinqwenele injongo, senza ngokufanelekileyo. Ukuba awufuni ukukhangela kwi-horizontal, awudingi iimpawu zecala ezicacileyo, kuya kuba nokwanele nje inzala.
- Sonke siyazi ukuba intombazana ukuqala ukuthandana ayiyinto engcolileyo. Nangona oomama banamhlanje abanqwenela ukugxininisa ukukhululwa kwabo ababesayi kunamahloni ukubonisa intetho kuzo zonke iinkalo zobomi, akukafaneli ukwenza oku, ukuqala ukuzithoba. Ngaphandle koko, ubeka umngcipheko wokuzilahla umdlalo othakazelisayo, ngoko ungaqhubeki. Ngoko, kufuneka uyenze ukubonisa loo mntu inzala yakhe? Kulula - ufuna ngokwenene ukuba ube nomdla kule ndoda kwaye ukhululeke ngokupheleleyo - ukuziphatha kwakho kuya kukuxelela yonke into - ngolwimi lwezenzo abazi ukuba bangathini yonke into, nangona bengazi ngako. Yonke into oyifunayo yimbini yemibono enomdla (kungakhathaliseki ukuba kuyinkxalabo ngokucophelela yento ngamehlo akho, njengokungathi uyakhokhela imali), ukumncumo othobekileyo, kunye nokukhululeka. Emva kwakho konke, nakunoma kunjalo nifuna ukuzonwabisa ngokudlala ngothando, udibanise kuyo kwaye ujabulele umdlalo sele usuvele kwimimiselo yokuqala.
- Ewe, nanguxesha elide, ngaphezu kobuqhelo obuqhelekileyo, umzimba oqhutywe kuyo kwindlela ekhangayo into enefuthe, kwaye kufike inxalenye enzima yolu hlobo-incoko. Oko kuthethayo akubaluleke kakhulu, into eyona nto yindlela oya kwenza ngayo. Umgaqo oyintloko - tshela ngaphantsi, phulaphula ngakumbi. Amadoda athande ukunqoba abafazi kunye nobungqina babo, ngoko kutheni ungabaniki ithuba. Kwaye zonke iigqabazo eziza kukhutshwa akufanele ube yi-sarcastic, inzima, umdla wakho onyanisekileyo, umnqweno wakho wokuxhasa incoko ibalulekile. Uloyikisayo umnxibelelwano ngeengxelo ezibuhlungu, ubeka ingozi yokuyeka umdlalo ngaphambi kwexesha. Ukuba ikhefu kwingxoxo isifikile, yindlela efanelekileyo yokuqhubeka nokunxibelelana, iya kuba yindumiso kumntu. Nguye umntu, kungekhona ukubonakala kwakhe. Ngokomzekelo, ufuna ukudumisa iimpahla zakhe (ukufikelela), wenzeni? Ukutsho okuthakazelisayo (enhle, eyokuqala) ukhethe ityayi yakho (ifowuni, i-dessert, njl.). Oko kukuthi, kubalulekile ukuba ungaboni nto, kodwa ubuchule bendoda ukuyikhetha. Kwaye, ebudeni benkqutyana yokukhanya edibeneyo yamkelwa,
kwakhona ukugxininisa umdla wabo kwingxoxo. - Indlela yokufunda ukudlala ngothando nomntu? Kubonakala ngathi ndiyazi into endiyenzayo, ndenza ngokufanelekileyo, kodwa ke ayisebenzi. Imeko eqhelekileyo? Isizathu sinokuba ngumkhululo, ukuzithemba okanye ukubonakalisa ukungabonakali. Ukubukeka kwendoda emele nje kuwe, unganqikazi ukugxininisa nokubonisa isithunzi somfanekiso wakho. Musa nje ukuthwala iingubo ezingenangqungquthela, mhlawumbi baya kumsunduza loo ndoda, okanye uya kuqondwa njengendoda enomdla kakhulu.