Oo, abahlobo bethu bathandekayo! Ngokuqhelekileyo amantombazana ayavuma ukuba "ndiyayithiya umhlobo wam obalaseleyo, uhlala efika ngexesha aze azise ezinye iingxaki." La mabhinqa angaba novelwano kuphela - umhlobo akayikho ibhotile yobhiya, awukwazi ukuyifumana kwisilahla. Kodwa kwiimeko ezilukhuni kunabo bafazi abasemngeni wabo obalaseleyo. Kwaye akukhona malunga neemeko apho abantu banjengaloo nto, sithetha ngabasetyhini abaphupha ngokuthandana nomhlobo womyeni wabo.
Ndifuna umhlobo wendoda yam - kufuneka ndiyenze ntoni?
Zama ukuvuma kumhlobo wakho "wathandana nomhlobo wam osenyongweni" kwaye ubone oko kwenzekayo. Uninzi mhlawumbi uza kuqala "ukubeka ubuchopho bakho", kukucebisa ukuba ubalekele ngento yokutshutshisa ngokukhawuleza. Nangona enye inketho inokwenzeka, ukuba intombi ingathwali imimiselo yokuziphatha, ngoko ibhunga lingalingeka ukuba lilahlwe. Kodwa yintoni enye indlela engcono kakhulu yokuphuma kwimeko?
Ukuze uphendule lo mbuzo, kufuneka uqonde imeko ngale nkcukacha. Emva kwakho konke, ahluke, kwaye awukwazi ukujonga bonke abafazi abafuna ukulala ngesondo nomyeni wakhe omhle nje ngabantu abonakele.
"Andiyithandi umyeni wam, kodwa ndifuna umngane wakhe"
Sonke siyazi malunga namabali, xa imitshatweni yenziwe ngobuqhophololo, "kwi-fly", kunye nabatshatileyo, emva kwithuba elithile emva komtshato, bayaqonda ukuba ubomi obudibeneyo abubanikiyo uvuyo. Kule meko, ukugweba umfazi ngenxa yokuthandana nomnye umntu, nokuba ngumhlobo womyeni wakhe, kunzima. Enyanisweni, kumyeni le ngxabano ayinakwenzeka ukuba ibalulekile, kodwa ngenxa yokuba ufanele udlale nomthandi wakho kwiintlola - ukuphuma, iiphasiwedi kunye nezinye izinto ezinandipha ubomi bobabini ziya kuba nawe de ulwalamano nomthandi wakho luyeke okanye ungenise umtshato.
"Ndiyamthanda umyeni wam kwaye ndifuna umngane wakhe"
Ukuba kwimeko yangaphambili, uxinzelelo olukhethekileyo lwengqondo oluvela kwintsimi yokuthandana nomnye umntu akufanele luvele, ngoko-ke, akakwazi ukuhanjiswa. Ukugqiba ngesondo kunye nomhlobo womyeni wakho, unobungozi bentlalo impilo, nokuba yinto emithathu. Njengoko umkhuba ubonisa, kumbhede womtshato kukulungele ukubiza umnqweno wesithathu ongazi, ongeke udibanise kunye naye kwimihla ngemihla. Ngoko ukuba uyamthanda ngokwenene umyeni wakho, kungcono ukulibala ngomhlobo wakhe. Nangona ulwalamano lwakho aluhlali ixesha elide, ngokuqinisekileyo ukutyelela kwakhe kwindlu yakho kuza kuhambisa imizuzu emininzi engathandekiyo. Oku kunjalo xa umhlobo engatshatanga, kwaye xa utshatile? Kwakhona kufuneka uqhagamshelane nomkakhe. Kodwa kulula ukutsho ukulibala, kodwa ungakwenza njani?
Zama ezi ngcebiso:
- Ngaba ucinga ukuba umhlobo wakho umyeni uyinto enhle yindoda? Kodwa uyaqonda ukuba abantu abalungileyo abakho. Khangela iimpazamo, kwaye wenze ngokucophelela, njengokungathi uzama ukucela isaphulelo, ukukholisa umthengisi ukuba impahla yakhe ayilunganga. Ingaba umhlobo womyeni wakho ukhululekile? Ukunganakwa, ukwesaba nokuzingca kubonakala. Nika ingqalelo kwimikhwa emibi, imilinganiselo emibi - uhlalutyo olunzulu lobuntu luya kukhupha umfanekiso ogqityiweyo owenziwe engqondweni yakho.
- Ukulahla imeko engqondweni yakho, ngokungathi uzimisele ukuzalisekisa umnqweno wakho. Khawucinge ukuba uzuze kule nto, ukuba ulahlekile. Yiba yinto engokoqobo, ungazakheli i-air lock. Ukuhamba ukuphatha kunye nokudibana, xa indoda ingekho ekhaya, ixesha elide aliyi kuphuma. Abantu baninzi
ngokucophelela kunokuba bafuna ukubonakala. Kwaye ukuba indoda ingayiqapheli utshintsho ekuziphatheni kwakho, abantu abanomdla baya kumkhanyisa. Ngaba ucinga ukuba ugogo oomnyango angayi kuqaphela ukuba omnye umntu uza kuwe xa engekho umyeni wakhe? Baya kuphawula kwaye bavule ngolwazi ngolwazi nabo bonke abathanda. Khawucinge nje oko kuya kwenzeka xa iveli yakho iyaziwa kubo bonke abantu. Ngaba ixabiso lexeshana leengxaki ezinjalo?
Naluphi na imeko, soloko uzama ukunxibelelana kwengqondo kulo mbandela, kungekhona imizwa. Ukuxhotywe ngephepha kunye neepeni. Bhala okanye udwebe imeko yakho uze uzame ukukucingela ukusuka kwicala. Ngamanye amaxesha kunokwenzeka ukuba kubonelele ukuba akunakwenzeka ...