Umbandela wothando uyamangalisa kwaye kunzima ukuchaza. Enyanisweni, kunzima ukucacisa ukuba kutheni ebomini phakathi kwenani elingenamlinganiselo lokukhetha sithandana nomntu omnye. Nangona kunjalo, izazi zengqondo zithi zonke izingozi zobomi bethu aziyiyo yonke into engozini, kwaye ukukhetha esikunika omnye, ukuchasa enye, kunokuchazwa kwakhona.
Ziziphi iimpawu zokukhetha othandekayo?
Nangona kunzima ukuba siqonde ukuba kutheni le nto, kwaye ingeyona enye, ibambe intliziyo yethu, kukho inkcazelo. Umbuso wothando lwabaninzi bethu ufikelele ebusheni butsha, kwaye lwakhiwe kwiimvakalelo zengqondo, ngokuphindaphindiweyo-umbhikisho (abazali abayithandi) isimo sengqondo ngokuthandana nothando. Siya kukhula, kwaye, kwenzeka, asikwazi ukuqonda ukuba kutheni sithandana nalo mntu. Kwaye kukho iingcaciso:
- Umbono wobugcisa . Iingcali zengqondo zithi ukukhethwa kwethu kweqabane elingacacanga (okanye ngokungaqondi) lithelekiswa xa lifaniswa nomfanekiso womnye wabazali (intombazana ithelekisa umfana wayo kunye noyise, le nsizwa imkhetha kunye nonina). Ngelo xesha, oku kungabonwa kuqala .
- Biochemistry . Xa bezama ukuqonda ukuba kutheni abantu bebathandana nomntu othile, banokuqwalasela iinkqubo ze-biochemical ezichaphazela uhlobo lokuzikhethela, kodwa kwakhona zidibene nendlu. Ngamnye wethu ujwayele ukungcola athile: iindawo zokuhlala, izinto zoomama noyise, iphunga lemimoya elithandwa nguMama, iphunga leemigayi elalihlolwe nguyise, njl njl. Ukuba ezo zivumba zitholakala kumntu owaziwayo, okhethiweyo (okanye okhethiweyo) uyazibhokoxa ngokuzikhethela.
- Indlela yokuziphatha . Ayikho indima yokugqibela kunye nokuziphatha komthandi. Ukuba ufumanisa ukuziphatha kobawo / umama (nokuba ngaba zizinto ezimbi), umntu onje uya "kutsala" kuye.
Kodwa ukuba yonke into idibene nemikhwa kunye nemifanekiso eqhelekileyo, kutheni umntu ewela ngokunyanisekileyo nomnye-umbuzo wendalo. Iingcali zenzululwazi zithi le nto ibangelwe kwizinga lokududuza kwangaphakathi, okwenziwe ngandlela-thile. Oku kudala uthando olukhawuleza.