Ngelishwa, ngamnye wethu ubuncinane kanye kanye ebomini bam becinga ngendlela yokuziphindezela. Ezi ngcamango zinokuba namandla kangangokuthi ziya kuthintela umntu ukuba angahlali nje elele, kodwa aphile, de kube umoni ofumana oko akufanele.
Abantu abaninzi bacinga ukuba impindezelo isabela ngokuqhelekileyo kumntu kwiintlungu ezibangelwa nguye. Nangona kunjalo, kukufanelekile ukukhumbula abantu basekuqaleni, apho i-blood feuds yaba yingcambu evaliweyo, ekhokelela ekufeni kweentsapho zonke. Ngoko ke, ukucinga malunga nendlela onokuziphindezela ngayo, kufuneka uqale ucinge ngako, kodwa mhlawumbi kufuneka uyenze ngaphandle kwayo kwaye uvumele ukuba ulungele ukulungisa yonke indawo kwindawo yayo ngexesha elifanelekileyo?
Kungcono kakhulu ukuphindezela?
Ukuba kunzima ukwenza ngaphandle kokuphindezela, ke unake ingqalelo kwiingcebiso ezinjalo:
- Ungalokothi uphinde uziphindiselele. Kufuneka uhlalise phantsi, cinga imeko uze uhlele izenzo zakho. Impindezelo entloko eshushu iyakhokelela kwiziphumo ezibuhlungu kumntu owenzayo.
- Ungabonisi ukuba ngandlela-thile ubambe indlela yokuziphatha komnye umntu, echasene nawe. Ukuba umntu wenza isenzo esilumkileyo sokuthukuthela okanye ukucaphuka, uya kuvuya ukubona ukuba uphumelele injongo yakhe.
- Ungaziphindezeli emva kokuba ukhubekile. Intshaba ingalungiselelwa impendulo. Kungcono ukulinda ixesha kwaye ushaye xa umntu omncinane elindele.
- Kubalulekile ukucinga malunga nendlela yokuziphindezela kumntu owonayo, ngaphandle kokuphula umthetho. Ukwenza oku, kukulungele ukusebenzisa iindlela eziza kubonakala ngathi abanye binyani kwaye bafanelekile. Ngokomzekelo, emsebenzini ungalinda umzuzwana xa umntu osebenza naye-mpazamo ephosakeleyo okanye xa umntu engonwabanga naye. Ukuba ufudumala ukungazinzi ngokubanzi, ngoko uluntu ngokwawo luya kulibuyisela.
- Ukuba ucinga ngendlela enokuziphindezela ngayo umoni, ke wena
Uya kufuneka ufunde yonke into malunga nalo mntu kuqala. Ulwazi olulungileyo luya kuba nolwazi malunga nento ayithandayo, indlela aphila ngayo, enokuthetha naye kunye nokoyikayo. Impindezelo enhle iya kuba yinto eyakhelwe ngoloyiko lomoni. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba umntu ukwesaba ukuhlaziswa kobuhlanga, indlela efanelekileyo kakhulu yokuphindezela iyakudala imeko apho umntu ehlazo lwazo zonke. Ukuba ukwesaba ukungakwazi, oko kufuneka ukuba kuboniswe kuyo yonke into yokuba umntu engabanikazi bakhe.
Ngokuqhelekileyo, impindezelo elungileyo nelungileyo yempindezelo, esilungisiwe kwaye ilungiselelwe ngokucophelela. Nangona kunjalo, oku kufuna amandla amaninzi kunye namandla okukufanele ukuqwalasela: ngaba umdlali wakho ofanelekileyo wenani elininzi lamandla akho kunye nokuqwalasela?