Nawuphi na umfazi uyavuya ukujonga emva komntu onamandla, onokuqonda, onothando, othembisa abanye ubuthathaka besifazane. Kodwa abantu abazungezile baninzi babone indoda enjengomfazi okhuseleyo womfazi wakhe.
Kodwa ngubani lo okhunjulwayo kwaye yintoni le nto?
Uyabona njani? Unomnene kwaye unomdla, uzalisekisa nayiphi na i-whims yomfazi wakhe, ungammangaleli ukuba aphikisana nantoni na. Ibhinqa limbona njani? Othandayo, olawulayo, osebenzayo, njalo ngenxa. Yaye le ndoda ibona njani imeko yakhe? Inokwenzeka ukuba, uziva unembopheleleko engabonakaliyo kwintsapho, ngelixa ekholelwa ukuba ibhinqa eliyi-priori elingcono liqonda yonke imicimbi yentsapho neyendlu. Kuhlala nje ukumamela. Ezi zibonakaliso zempawu ezixutywayo.
Indoda ibonakala ikhutshwe njani?
Ukufuna umfazi ngamanye amaxesha ukhula ube ngumxinzelelo rhoqo kumyeni wakhe - "ufanele", "kufuneka", "ungumntu". Ukubusa okuvela kumfazi akuthandi abantu abaninzi. Baqala ukulahlekelwa yintloko yabo yentsapho kwintsapho. Nangona kubalulekile ukuvuma, ininzi enendima namhlanje iyalungiselela. Ukuba abo bantu abathintekayo abazivekanga ngokwabo kwintsapho, ngoko ke bayazithula ngokukhawuleza baze bazikhangele kwisisombululo kwimiba yentsapho. Kodwa kuyafaneleka ukuba umfazi "athabathe" ngaphezulu, azalise imisebenzi yawo, ukuze "awele emva".
Kwabafazi abaninzi kukho imeko eqhelekileyo. Kule meko, abafazi kufuneka bathathe yonke imisebenzi kwiintsapho ngexesha elifanayo kwaye babe "indawo yokuhlala". Abaninzi babo baqhinga, bekhalaza ngomyeni wakhe, bachaza umfanekiso wesimo sengqondo. Emva koko, baqala ukuzikhethela indima "ebalulekileyo" kwintsebenziswano yabo.
Kuthetha ukuthini - i-henpecked?
Ukuba ukhangele ingxaki ngokubanzi, kwaye ukuba uyicinga le meko yezinto njengengxaki, kuyacaca ukuba abaninzi abasetyhini abazi indlela yokusombulula le ngxaki. Baye baqhelanisa nendima yabo 'eqinile' kunye 'nokuzithemba' ngokufaneleka kwabo komntu, bengabalingani ngenye imibono kwintsapho. Kodwa phakathi kwabasetyhini kukho abo bavele baphupha "ngeentambo" zithandwa zabo kwaye bafuna ukuba nendoda ene-henpeck ecaleni kwayo, ingakumbi ukuba kukho inzala.
Amantombazana amaninzi kumnxeba abuza umbuzo-indlela yokwenza umntu okhukhumele umfazi wakhe? Kwaye, ngokubalulekayo, banikwa iingcebiso ezininzi kwiiwebhusayithi ze "gurus" zendawo. Abesifazane abaninzi "abanolwazi" kulo mbandela ba khuthaza loo nto mbazana ngengcamango yokuba ngokwenza umntu okhukhumezekile baya kukwazi ukufumana "umntu othe tye" oza kufezekisa yonke into enomdla.
Kodwa musa ukulibala ukuba umntu "oyinyaniso" okanye "ococekileyo" ngumntu othabatha uxanduva ngokupheleleyo kwiintlalo kunye nokuchuma kwintsapho . Ngaphezu koko, akayi kukhokelwa ngokupheleleyo yintetho yomfazi kwiingxaki ezibalulekileyo. Kodwa udinga ukuxhaswa ngokomzimba nangokwenyama kumfazi wakhe othandekayo.